Unwillful Goodbye

It falls to the floor  but no one knows its there.
For all they know it's non-existant.

... It's the red ribbon on the rose you never had.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

The Stars of Your Eyes

They’re the little twinkle of emotion every now and then. They can run like rivers or freeze like a pond on an ever-so-calm day. They are quiet and subtle; only the truly worthy can see the treasures they possess. Are you capable of holding someone’s heart?

There are some things in this world that are more precious than others.

…They’re all worthy of tears.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

At the Break of Dawn

The sky is still dark when you shut your door and walk along your path. 

Nothing speaks of your presence except for the loud tap tap of your feet against the gravel. 

The air is colder than you expect and it brushes across your face and combs your hair ever so gently.

 Something at the back of your mind, hidden in the dark sordid corners of your heart; something emerging from the sides of your eyes, stings in a warm-turned-cold kind of way.

There’s a distance you cannot bring your words to speak of; it’s too painful. 

So you continue on, unnoticed, to become the person you want to be. 

You don’t realize it’s probably the same person you are now in a different environment, living in the same altered way. 

It’s like being on two different sides of the street; each side looks completely different from the other.

    We’re all ghosts in this world, ghosts of our own beings.

...Dress accordingly.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Touched with the Color of Life

She lay there numb and lifeless in the frost bitten snow.

The stars were quietly mourning. The soft pure white dribbled with red.

Tragic.

...And nobody will know why.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Cold Dread

Jan.18.10
7:30pm

She desperately looked out to the darkness,
 longing to escape;
 debating whether or not to risk it all for uncertainty;
 to step into the cold;
whispering to it silently,
 begging it to fill the void inside.


But the chains reeled her in.
Dragging her across the pavement,
peeling the very thought off her bare skin.

The chains forcing her back behind iron bars to be caged like an animal

… forcing her back home.


Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Absence of Words

Dec. 26.09
1:49am

A silent whimper played in reverse.
An endless shadow sprawled out on the floor for the dead to see.
A grey mist of blinding desease.
An addiction of emptiness too complex to share.
An icy dew clinging onto my skin; freezing; hurting; refusing to evaporate,
to cry and seep into the pores everlonging to be drenched in rich emotion.
A sting of pain; a wince far to swift for a rythmic rush of adjectives.
A short of breath of the weak condenced into a mineute space, trapped in a motionless environment.
A sound lacking a melodic consistancy.
A darkness dulled without it's lack of hue and a light calmed without it's sparkle.
Faded images corroded with false hopes and broken memories.
Intoxicated with the impulse to regurgatate the thick liquor far too sweet for thought.




This absence of words
  ... is an absence of you.




Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Death by Starry Night

Nov.19,09
11:02pm




Darkness enclosed her mind.
Her open wound stung,
letting the evening air trickle into her blood.
Her eyes open wide and her lip quivering;
Her cheek wet with cold sobs.
Falling, she holds out her hand,
Hoping to grasp another.
Her hair softly caressing her face as she tumbles to the ground.
Shattered glass rains upon her violently,
as the stars light up the black sky.


There is no one there to save her
... there is no one there to hear her scream.



Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Onto the Nothing

Nov.5.09

7:35am

I love the way the silence creeps down and covers the poorly washed tiles and the grey cobwebs with a sense of tranquility and solitude.

I love the way the cold freshness stings my lungs as my fingers redden with numbness.

I love the way the orange and pink disperse, coloring the nothing that surrounds me for just a split second.

And then,

... the day begins.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Nameless Soul

nov.3.09

11:34pm

"Happiness in the world".

She was the sole exception to that statement.

Not because she could not see it, nor because she could not find it,

but because she could not feel it.
She, as many did, wanted either to fit in or stand out.

She attempted both and failed.

With her strong spine and her enthusiasm, she smiled upon the cutest romances around her,

just as she did when she found beauty in tragedy.

She seemed to see beauty in even the saddest of situations,

but yet she could not see the beauty within herself.

Perhaps that was her downfall.

Perhaps that was her fate.

Wether or not there existed beauty within her or any happiness for her to feel, is a question to go unanswered.

She is a soul without a name.

...All that is left of her are remains for the crows to pick at.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Six Seconds

Oct.31st,09

1:18am

6 seconds.

hold me

tight

tell me goodbye.

sweet smile

soft voice

one movement

one touch

one moment

strong build

too close

pull me in

perfect fit

melting in

heart remembering

emotion surging

too subtle

but all so there

6 seconds.

hold me tight

die inside,

...say goodbye.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Tomorrow's Yesterday

Oct.26,2009

10:47pm

If there was ever a day I missed you, it was today.

Today.

Insignificant yet anything but worthless.

A day of tangible values;

A tomorrow of rage;

A yesterday of morals.

A clock lacking sleep and a heart hurting others.

A time-bomb of poisonous confetti that burn to contagious ashes.

The hornless bull sees red, but the leopard shows its teeth. The river over flowed.

If there was ever a day

I remembered,

I needed,

I loved,

I missed you,

It was today.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Song Bird's Melody

Oct. 14, 2009

10:49pm

The torment of inadequacy seems to color the trees.

But this, this, is revolutionary to the beating muscle in my chest.

It compels me to wish I was blind. It streams through my blood with a thick viscosity as the dove and the raven fly as one.

What is this uncanny mixture of emotion?

Could it be jealousy?

And there in the distance, near the pond of virtue and the flowers of sin, flutters a tiny colored feather in the breeze.

It is the feather of whom is bruised and numb.

It is the feather of the song bird that sings a heartbreaking tune of inadequacy and suicide.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Vortex of Nothing

Oct 10, 2009
11:55pm


There is an empty hole within me.


It is all too familiar.

It is dark and cold. There is no light to call upon for comfort. There are no reasons to tingle with delight.
It, in itself, is a world of its own.

I, unlike many others, understand it's existence.
Yet, I am powerless against it.

There are days when this hole releases sadness within my veins like an eradicating poison. It fills my being with the agony of truth, sheer agony, and insanity. It exhumes my hate toward my emptiness into frustration of an inhuman kind.
There are other days when it seems to absorb the life out of myself.

Those are the days when everything goes numb.

.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Eternally Silent

September 14, 2009

10:46 pm

Forever.

Like a sweet and sticky sap, smothered all over your palette, it beseeches you to speak of it's presence. A word of all words, to roll off your toung in sugar crystals.

Forever. Forever.

The more it is called upon, the deeper it's vortex becomes.

Forever. A vortex of black, colored in stars.

Forever.

Perhaps not continuous, but rather a suspension in time. Suspended and thus eternally alive.

Forever.

Echoing images and harmonic softness. Forever.

The grasp of a heart with a quickened pulse.

Forever. Forever.

Can u feel it's weightlessness; it's numbness?

A mirror world of grey into a sea of metallic darkness.

Forever. It twirls within the wind, dancing among the glitter and withered rose petals.

An aroma that tickles.

Forever. A meaning of nothing but everything.

The Word of Eternal Slumber.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Whispers of the Past

September 12, 09
11:30 pm

The past glares back at her
with something unfamiliar, something changed, and sprinkled with the essence she once knew.

A change that burns her insides; tainting her fondest portrait.

And yet this alteration only compels her want to know more, to examine, to understand; to repossess what was once so close to her heart.

A temptation that stings her eyes to resist.

And thus the darkness invades as the containment of solitude reinforces itself upon the hidden kiss forever awaiting to be laid.

Papers fly; lines bent and twisted; endless emotion with too few words.

The past glares back at her.
And she must tear her eyes
-and heart-
away from the only thing that made her
happy.


Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

My Secret Song

Sept 7th, 2009 - 12:48 am

Do you hear it?

Drifting sweetly within the wind, there is a faint melody.

It's quiet but it's there.

It's softness combs the sun-speckled trees and cools the darkened seas.

It sings a ghostly lullaby of promises unkept and whispers of the past.

A silent lullaby.

It is silent because only I can hear it.

And there, among the thorns, blooms a rose of everlasting grace, that is calm and deadly. Deadly to all but one.

The butterfly.

Simple, harmless and beautiful.

It, too, is silent, but paints the picture of hope with thin and delicate brush strokes.

Delicate and peaceful.

Peace, a land not yet embraced by passion or existance, and thus reveals it's essence: dark and undenyably lonely.

And this butterfly holds the secret to this land, to this beautiful darkness of a silent song, to the colors of life and death. To the battle between a tormenter of life and a secret dreamer.

The wonders of a an enchanting cloud;

The serenity of soft skys;

The divinity of a wild rose.

These can all be who I am.

But I have chosen the Silence.

The silence of laughter; of smiles that have already burst; of days already lived; of steps already taken

and of songs already sung.

And there amoung the roses beneath the crimson skies,

there flutters a lonely butterfly carrying the blessing and the curse

of a silent lullaby.

I am a secret dreamer.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥ஜღ Silent Lullaby of a Lonely Butterfly ღஜ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ